Creatively Corrupted!

• Hearing an old friend's voice has never felt so relieving.
• Bacardi 151 with blue kool-aid is beyond godly.
• I can handle DDR on expert mode.
• I'm attatched to Naruto because I can relate every character to someone who's influenced my life. (Kakashi - Bryan, Sakura - Chelsea, Eric - Sai/Sasuke, etc.,.)
• I have horrible speech when I'm intoxicated.
  

Last but certainly not least, I found this out today:

• I cannot sleep in the same bed as Chelsea. Our sleeping habits are complete opposite!
  

I'm glad I documented my search for Eric and how much he means to me.
Basically, I hurt him and left. I know the pain and sadness from it because it happened to me.
I too was abandoned by someone who meant the world to me; no strings attached.

When I e-mailed Eric, I told him that even if he chooses not to reply to me, I just want him to know that I care about his well-being and that I'm sorry. This morning, it was as if I gazed into a mirror and was placed in his shoes. I, too, received an e-mail from an old friend.. A friend so important to me, I realized how lonely my life has been without him as a friend. I had come to senses that there was actually a gap in my life, I was a fool to think I did not need it replaced. His words were like a song, a song we sung together; long ago.

I will not share all the contents of the e-mail because most of it should be private, but I will show this one part:


Immediately, as if from a movie, my heart stopped and my eyes watered. It never felt so great to re-unite with a good friend. A friend.. Not my boy-friend, someone beside me through thick and thin. I'm waiting for a reply from my friend, a chance to catch up on lost time.

This whole post - I want to conclude to one thing. Karma.

Sorry Ii haven't posted in awhile - I guess I've just been busy or I haven't too much to write about. I get ideas but when I start writing them they just fade or turn as dry as toast on a cold winter's day. Really.

I guess for starters - I am back into Naruto; it sucks. Not the show, the show is absolutely amazing and I'm put in awe after each episode. That being said I have so much to catch up on and I have no time for it.. I think in the summer I will start watching from the beginning; sometimes I feel that I'm missing something important. I remember the first time I watched Naruto with Eric - I kept asking who that "guy" was in the intro, the one standing on the phone wire. He kept shushing me and telling me that I'll learn eventually. God, I love Hatake Kakashi. I miss having a friend that loved Naruto as much as I do - it's such a good show, putting aside all the crazy fangirls cosplaying to it.

Eric.. He's a big chapter in my life and I'm just realizing this. I've began my search yet again to find him.

Secondly; My one and only exam starts tomorrow - I don't have to study for it. That's great and all but the problem is that I have so much art work to do it's not funny. Art projects is so much different than an english paper or a math sheet. Sometimes you can be artistic and sometimes you can't. I'm in a block right now so in the end I will get a bad mark on anything I do. I need 3 more landmark sceneries and 8 more pictures of pretty much anything.. Except anime. He yelled at me for doing that.

So in conclusion I want be doing any "chillin' with homies," Warcraft, or anything that really implies "fun."

BAH HUMBUG.

"How would you feel if you lived in Gaza - living in terror every-day?"

Touchy question. Death, blood, mutilation; it scares me. It makes my skin crawl, it makes my veins twist, it makes me cry. Whether it's from a movie, a story, a picture.. I honestly couldn't imagine living through it. All I would feel is lonesome and a black, unknown fear. I wouldn't function properly - I would be too afraid to run even if I knew that staying could kill me.

We live in tough times, my friends. If I was able to take a family, a child, a stranger.. If I could give them my house, my bread, my water. I would. I can't. Government and papers prevent this help; I don't speak their language. If they don't listen to the United States why would they listen to me? There is only hoping that the ceasefire comes soon and more innocent people don't die.

What are you doing right now? Are you enjoying a warm cup of coffee, are you surfing through the internet and chatting to friends on an instant messaging system, are you getting ready for school, dinner, watching TV? Imagine what some people your age are doing right now; in the middle east. Are you capable of putting yourself in their situation? I don't think I am.

Pain. Destruction. Grief. Violence. Hatred. War.. Sorrow. Mankind.

It is of no secret that I use the alias "Burgundy" online; it's found in my e-mail address, my Warcraft characters, my log-ins to various websites, and of course - my blog. Although I intentionally issued it as my favourite colour, the colour of my hair, the colour of my bedroom walls. I'm well aware that there used to be a place in Europe named "Burgundy." Don't know where Burgundy was? It's non-existant today (Such as Prussia and so on). Think between France and Switzerland. The Celts, Romans, etc.,. inhabited the land - as the 4th century approached the Germans took over and declared their kingdom.. Who would've thought, I know!

You're probably wondering what this has to do with any-thing, well here's what I found. My last name is Nadeau; I'm quite proud of it. The name 'Nadeau' derived in a small kingdom named "Burgundy." : )

I love history - I absolutely adore it. I wish more people in our world would learn about their family's history and see who they came from. It's unfortunate that people are living for today but without regards to yesterday.

Last week wasn't special, yesterday was uneventful, today was boring. Tomorrow.. Tomorrow will be like another cog in the machine. I don't have much planned for this week, besides school I plan to stay home and catch up on work - supposedly on Wednesday I'm going to go shopping for a few things.
Hello 2009, good riddance to 2008. Besides my trip to see Jason it was quite the unattractive 365 days. In 2009 I plan to:

• Get a job.
• Move to Oregon.
• Lose Weight.
• Stop fooling myself with crazy plans.

There's one more ambition I'm aiming for.. It's not big but it's important. I want to have a better attendance in school. I think this year I'm just extremely unchallenged with classes. Sp-ed math, art, Clothing/Cooking, PAL/CLM.. Really, the only one that takes thought is Art - that's about it.
I just want to move, I want to be done with the hectic school and move onto a career and family.. I feel so trapped here. I know I have friends here, I'll be bummed to leave them behind, but that's life for you. We all move on eventually..